The Real Girlfriends of JMU

The first couple of months of #ThirtyandThriving are off to a great start.

I am forever grateful for the middle places, the uncomfortable phases you go through to grow through. You know what I'm talking about. Been there, done that, NEXT! I always say November is the month of transition; and here I am, transitioning to the next thing. What is the next thing?

​Let's start with reading shall we? Earlier this year, my friend asked what books she should read. Her Masters completed, it's time to read for pleasure and not for class. My fellow coffee writer/creative came through in the clutch and suggested a few good reads. One book in particular, "Year of Yes" x Shonda Rhimes caught my attention. The friend that asked about the books jumped on it. She ordered her copy the following week and ordered me one too.

Real girlfriends don't let their friends read or write alone. Quote me on that.  

However, the book sat on my night stand for months collecting dust. Not because I didn't want to read, but because I just simply did not have time or rather I didn't intentionally make time. Work /life balance can be a struggle. I have written plenty about that. Working long hours, commuting, Mommin, event planning, being a good gf (I'm trying to get wifed), house-keeping, trying to work out.... you get the picture. That is why I started #MeTimeMay... y'all remember that? Yeah pfft. 

To quote Shonda,

“[People] depend on me for work. I’m a mother who works.  I’m a working mother.

Like… Beyoncé.

Yes.

Exactly like Beyoncé.”

I told myself I would read when I had time. Truth is, when I actually did have time, I didn't want to read. I wanted to sleep, surf Pinterest, and play with Brayden. Other times I wanted to just sit and breathe. NOT DO A THING. Just sit. And breathe. So on those days, I did just that.  I knew eventually, I would read the book, because I genuinely wanted to. So I started while I was on vacation. Perfect, right? Deep dark shades of blue that turned clear closer to shore. Beautiful view, my crew, and the book that I needed to read.

Now let me back up just a bit--- I believe in divine intervention, but y'all know that already. Still there are times when I am utterly amazed at God's work. I know He is perfect and everything He does is on point, so to live it and do it and reap what you sow knowing that the blessing already had your name on it. The thought alone is mind blowing and yet it keeps happening. LOL

Real girlfriends inspire friends to do, be, and live better. Quote me on that as well.

My girls arrived at Casa de la Beez early Thursday morning so we could get thru security screening w/o delay. One minor issue on my end.... I was having some anxiety leaving Brayden while he was sick. Mama Bear was in full mode, my baby needed me and I was leaving for the Bahamas. The anxiety was enough to send my hives a message and on Tuesday, they appeared. Face full of hives. I felt like a bad mom. Beez wasn't having it and told me to chill out, go on the trip, relax and let my hair down; he had it covered. My mom said the same thing. Go figure. Mamas know best. My friends too, hit me with the "Norms, he'll be fine. Brian has him." "Ciera, you are not a bad mom. Mama has to have a life too" ... After a smidge of horrible tasting coffee and honey nut Chex Mix for breakfast; I obliged. We were off to Nassau for some much needed sunrays and beach waves. OPI ‘Crop-tops and Flip-flops’ Pink was the color of choice; so very fitting for the Breezes Blue Adventure that awaited us.

The trip overall was nothing short of amazing. We tried new things, we laughed, I cried, we prayed, we danced, we sipped, we drank, we ate, I sang, we came, we saw, we loved.   The Fantastic Four, our call sign (given by the attentive staff of Breezes Resort and Spa), for a few days, we lived in paradise. 

I went snorkeling for the first time; legit swam with turtles half the size of me. The view in the Atlantic was literally breathtakingly beautiful. The key to snorkeling is of course breathing thru the tube. I lost my breath at the view, opened my mouth and the salt water came rushing in LOL epic fail, but major Ci-win. I was terrified to get in the deep-deep water, probably because I almost drowned one time when I was seven. Nonetheless, I swam, I snorkeled, I conquered my suppressed fear. We were viewing a live screen saver. The vibrant colors, the unbothered marine life, us—smack dab in the middle of the Atlantic. From the boat, I couldn’t have imagined the sight underwater. That was definitely a high-point of the trip.

I also tried sushi… well a California Roll and conch. The Breezes Staff were awesome and made sure we were well taken care of. Since this was part III of my birthday festivities, we acted accordingly. I had a birthday cake and the Stevie Wonder version of Happy Birthday sang to me.

On our last full day, we decided to sit poolside/beachside and recoup from the Saturday night shenanigans. The birthday turn-up was too real. Sunday recoup was a unanimous vote. I started reading the book--“Year of Yes”. As I read the welcome prelude and prologue I laughed. I was immediately drawn in and as I continued to read, I knew why I was supposed to read this book. The universe always conspires in your favor. Remember that. In that moment, on Cable Beach in Nassau, I had my "aha" moment.  [They just keep happening and I love it!] All the self-talk, doubts, positive reaffirmations, conversations, self-evaluations came full circle. Smiling at the thought, zoning out and no longer reading my mind was on 1000.  

My spontaneous coffee writer/creative is the poster lady for YOLO and we couldn't let her leave alone. Divine Intervention. We ended up hitting the town one more time, to see the gravesite of Anna Nicole Smith. Our driver mentioned his mother was buried at that cemetery but he didn’t know where exactly. We helped him locate his mother's grave, on the day before her death. He mentioned how he and his sisters wanted to come there. He can now show his sisters their mother’s site. I was so overjoyed and began thinking of my own father’s grave and how I needed to visit soon. My heart was full for our driver (Mr. Hanna), the tears started flowing. I told the girls I felt like I needed to pray in that moment. They all reached out to hold hands as if on cue. The sun was setting, we were praying.  And to think we almost didn't leave the resort that day.

Real girlfriends pray with you and for you, always.

We know how to play but we are also about our business. Two of my friends worked a bit while we were out. Teleconferences and emails in the airport. One is so diligent, that this is the second trip we have been on together and both times she had her laptop in tow, doing homework in our down time. She will have her Masters next month. On the flight back to VA, we discussed how we would attack the week ahead. Fresh from vacay and we were already in “Let’s get it” mode. Another reason I love my girlfriends.

Iyanla Vanzant says "Plan your work and work your plan".... so the next few months of #ThirtyAndThriving will be filled with just that---planning the work and executing the plan. I am so excited to be inspired and encouraged by strong Black women.

Real girlfriends will always encourage you and support your craft. Yes, quote that too.

Today, I am ready. I am willing and I say yes.

The coffee writers will do what we do best, sit, sip, and write. This upcoming planning session at a local cafe will be everything I need for my year of yes.  

Stay Tuned.